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I've only been a Beatles fan for eight or nine years. In the grand scheme of things that I've been a fan of, the Beatles are not nearly one of my most prolific loves. But they do have an important role in my life.

Without me really realizing it, Paul was clearly my favorite. John was a little too angsty for me, George was too quiet, and ringo reminded me of my little brother. This isn't just in personalities. I loved most of the primarily-by-Paul songs before I even knew who wrote them.

I've been to maybe a dozen concerts in my life, but most of them have been small community or radio-type concerts (I saw Taylor swift in a $5 concert series 2006 to coincide with her debut album, Josh Abbott's annual 4th of July show in Lubbock, that sort of thing.) the only other big show I've seen was Elton John in April 2010...Elton had an AWESOME show. Two and a half hours long, all amazing songs, it was great. I would say of living songwriters, Elton and Paul are my favorites. After seeing Elton, seeing Paul was an item on my bucket list: see Macca in concert before he dies.

At some point, I guess I signed up for Paul McCartney email alerts. This last September and October, I was working a temp job, and after every 20th page of data entry, I let myself check my email or browse the Internet for five minutes.

One day in the middle of September I got an email saying he was playing four dates in north America: St. Louis, Houston, Edmonton, and Vancouver. I said, "that would be so great!" but it was on a Wednesday so I didn't buy them.

With the prodding of [ profile] k8_26_2, I decided to buy them. Cheap seats because McCartney needs to make up for divorcing heather mills, but I bought them and got excited.

I had mentioned it to Jack, who you may know as my not-so-secret unrequited love/best friend of ever. He mentioned in passing that he might be interested in going, but whenever I mentioned it again, he got all weird. (Note: Jack loves McCartney. He's more of a strictly-Beatles guy whereas I love Wings and solo stuff, but I figured he would like to go with me.) It was a Wednesday, and he works driving busses at his college, which is not far away from Houston. Houston is 10 hours away from our house, though, so it was going to be a long drive. And then he started complaining about how he was lucky to get thanksgiving off of work, so I didn't push it. (Things have been weird between us since he moved into his new house. I think one of the roommates kind of makes fun of him about our relationship--the phone calls have gotten shorter and more furtive and the texts are sporadic...when his new roommate is out of town, it's more normal to what we always have been.)

Anyway, Jack couldn't go, so I asked my best female friend/partner in crime, but her birthday was on Monday and she has stuff to do so she couldn't go. So I thought about just selling my tickets but THEY NEVER CAME BECAUSE OF SNOREASTERCANE SANDY. I had to pick them up at will call. Meaning I had to go. So I asked my mom. My mom works from home and basically sets her own hours, so it's pretty easy for her to get up and go wherever she wants. She agreed to come with me, and we left. Long ride, introduced her to John Mulaney's stand up, never heard her laugh so hard at stand-up.

Anyway, here's the set list with some of my comments:

Magical Mystery Tour
Juniors Farm
Jet (awesome Suffragette stuff on the screen behind him!)
Got to get you into my life 
Sing The Changes (The background on this was like lighted butterflies that morphed into Obama's head? I don't know, it was weird.)
The Night Before
Let me Roll it (wow SO GOOD holy shit anyone who says he doesn't have it is SO WRONG. This song was AMAAAAZING.)
After this, he told a story about Hendrix and Clapton and tuning guitars and it was adorable.
Paperback Writer
Long and winding road (This was the first time he was at the piano, and in his reflection in the piano, he looked 40 years younger. It was the first time I got super emotional. I didn't cry, but it was coming up.)
My valentine (He said he wrote this song for his wife, Nancy, and the drunk belligerent ladies next to me were screaming about the "one legged bitch." But more on them later.)
Maybe I'm Amazed (The screen was a video of wolfman Paul and his daughters is the first time I cried tonight--the photo from the reverse side of the McCartney album with him and his baby Mary in his coat and turns out Heather was standing right next to him. It was so gorgeous, and I just started crying at some point, I don't know when.)
I'm looking through you
And I love her 
Blackbird-He told a story about the Civil Rights movement encouraging him to write it, and all the acoustic loveliness was gorgeous.
Here today- This song was for John and he said it was about saying I love you before its too late GODDAMNIT Paul--makes me want to DO SOMETHING in my life with the people I love.
Mrs Vanderbilt- the Oh! eh oh! echoed SO COOL in the stadium.
Band on the Run was FUCKING AWESOME. The third part was good. Ugh, so many crying.
Then had us do vocal warm ups and it was cute.
Then there was a great sing-along with Ob-la-di.
Day in the life went into Give Peace a Chance.--the security guards were dancing.
Let it be was gorgeous, again, more crying.
Live and Let Die was the whole reason the roof was open all night and everyone was freezing and confused as to why the roof was open except me: BECAUSE FIREWORKS. and then after Paul was all deaf and it was really smokey for Hey Jude.
Hey Jude--singalong, awesome as always.
Then the band left and Paul came out for the first Encore with a Texas flag, and just ran all over the stage.
Lady Madonna--the first beatles song I actually ever loved, this one held a special place in my heart.
Day Tripper
Get Back--saw the Hofner Bass and knew he was going to play it, he grabbed it and I said to my mom, "it's going to be Get Back" and then he said "Anybody want to Get Back?!" and everyone started screaming
Second encore
Yesterday (After the first encore, someone threw a bunny on stage and he played the second encore with a stuffed bunny in his back pocket)
Helter Skelter was ROCKING and I called that too--because it's just an epic song and it had to play.
I had no idea what was coming up, but I knew it was going to be last.
And then it was the Abbey Road Medley. And I just fucking bawled my eyeballs out screaming and crying and singing along.

When we moved to Texas, I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep and I couldn't breathe when I was supposed to be sleeping. When I did manage to fall asleep, I had nightmares. The only way that I could bring myself to fall asleep was to listen to the end of the Abbey Road Medley (Golden Slumbers-Carry That Weight-The End) on repeat. I would cry and cry and cry but it would calm me down and I could sleep. It wasn't great sleep, but it allowed me to deal with the shittiness of my life.

Somewhere in that line-up, Eleanor Rigby and 1985 played, but I had no idea where they fit.

We had drunk belligerent ladies sitting next to me. They were terrible. Every 30 seconds they would scream about how they were so happy and how Paul looked good and he still had it.

It was just so good, you guys. Life-changing experience.

My mom was born in 1967 and so knew some songs (Wings especially) inherently, but really, only three or four of the 30-odd songs he played. The whole time I was there, I was thinking, fuck, i wish he was here with me. And then All the Songs Make Sense and that really didn't help with the emotion that I was feeling.

This is really disjointed, but I was also having an emotional day because my mom insisted on shopping (I hate shopping) and she made me try on pants because none of my pants fit (i've gone up two sizes from the last time I bought pants). And when I looked at them, they were HUGE. I looked at them and they were SO BIG and then they fit perfectly and I just...I couldn't contain myself. Like, I feel terrible about the way I look, but there is nothing that makes me want to try and lose weight. My eating habits haven't changed in the last four years or so, and neither has my exercise level. I have an idea as to why I've gained the weight (hormone imbalance) but really don't want to go to the doctor--I'm not working so I feel pretty damn useless and I hate people spending money on me or on myself when I am not doing anything productive with my time.

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